Tuesday, September 30, 2008

changes......

I guess we are going to be traveling down a new road now.  AOL journals is closing.  So sad.  I have made so many friends here and I will miss them if they choose not to blog someplace else.  I hope you all do choose to continue blogging someplace else.  If you do please send me the link so I can continue to follow you.  Here is the link to my new one.

http://sangriatimescontinuehere.blogspot.com/

Big day!


Today is the anniversary of Mom's death.  It has been 10 years.  It seems like yesterday in so many ways but in so many others it seems forever ago.  My mom and dad are the ones on the far right.  Her hair looks crazy in this picture! I hated this day for several years.  It was so hard just to make it through the day.  I honestly believe she hated how badly I felt every year on this day.  So four years ago she sent me a gift.  A beautiful, wonderful gift and his name is AIDEN.  Aiden wasn't due until November 7th (which is my birthday) so he came quite early.  He struggled for quite a few weeks in NICU but he pulled through and as most of you know he is the light of my life!
I still cry on this day.  I still struggle but I know she doesn't want me to.  I know she wants me to be happy so in just a few hours I will call that little boy up and I will sing Happy Birthday to him and he will talk to me and my day will be wonderful after that.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LITTLE MAN!!  Grandma loves you more than words can say.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Is it true?


Ok I am wondering.....if you consider yourself a democrat or if you vote democrate mean that you are not a Christian?? 

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Ok I admit it.....


I admit it.  I love love stories.  I know I told you all that I was reading a book and I just could not get into it.  I really tried to like it, I swear I did.  The book was a book by the name of "Magic Hour"  the author is "Susan Isaacs".  A murder mystery.   I know that the book is a good one because I did not want to put it down but I just could not get into it.   Just not my kind of book.  I read 130 pages of 450 page book and still was not into it.  I swear I tried but it just wasn't there for me.  So tonight when I came home I read a few pages and said  "this isn't me".  Set the book down and went and picked a book out of my pile (and yes I do mean PILE)  Hummmm....Danielle Steele....... I could feel the vibes of goodness (LOL) as soon as I picked it up...."Message from Nam" .......................I swear to you, I tried to reform.............I tried to love or at least LIKE  a different type of book but I am hooked........and I am only on page 17!!!  I must leave you all to go read.................

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Feeling better


Good Morning.  I am feeling better this morning.  I still have nothing resolved with my family but it is amazing what some sleep will do for your spirits.  I still have no idea what I am going to do about it but I do know that I am going to give it some time before I decide. 
I am working some crazy hours this week.  One of the supervisors where I work is off for a few days and I am covering.  I am working from noon till 10pm each day.  I do 10 hour shifts and have Monday's off but I normally work from 6am till 4pm.  This shift is much different.  I feel like I do not get anything done!  It feels like the only time I am home is when I am sleeping!  I am glad that is for only a few days.  If I had to work the afternoon shift for any length of time I would have to go back to working 5 days 8 hour shifts so that I could have some time during the day to get things done. 
This weekend Mark and I are going to the U of M game.  I am very excited about it.  We have season tickets but we have not been able to go to the first two games because of conflicts schedule wise.  We sold the first two games and now we get to go to this one!!  I am very much looking forward to spending some time with my husband.  We seem to be two ships passing in the night lately!   Life sure does get in the way of things sometimes.
We will be leaving for Talladega next week.  Thursday through Monday!!  I can't wait to see Linda.  Talladega is always so much fun.  (Nascar racing event for those of you that don't know!)  The only thing that I don't like about it is the drive.  It takes 12 hours to get there.  That is a long car drive.  Oh well it is worth it.  That is another 12 hours I get to spend with my husband alone right?
Well I need to get out the door and get my run in before work.  Have a great day!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Brain dead


I think my brain is on overload.  The last two days have been filled with stress and I just don't get it.   Sometimes family can drive you just about crazy.  I'm not talking about my kids either, cuz they do thier own little number on me, but I am talking about my brother and sister.  I still am not sure how the whole situation spiraled out of control so quickly.  But one thing led to another very quickly and harsh words were spoken, unfortunatly to me.  I didnt' deal well with it.  I am not sure how we are going to mend this one but it is going to take awhile.  Maybe, if ever.  Not sure at this point.  My brother is a very stubborn man and I am not sure it will ever get worked out.  I have cried for the last 24 hours about this and I can't cry anymore.  Who knows what will happen.  I just know that I am exhausted from the whole ordeal and am left wondering what the hell happened to make this all so crazy.
I wish I had some happier things to talk about, oh wait I do have one really happy thing.  I made another 247.00 at the bucket drive this weekend!  THat did make me very happy to get that email telling me that.  I am very excited about going to San Franciso for this marathon.  We are leaving on Oct. 15 and we are staying for a week.  We have lots of things planned for the week.  It will be fun and I am looking forward to getting away that is for sure. 
I am worn out I am going to go to bed and hopefully sleep much better than I did last night.
I do have one question for you all though.
How many pages do you continue to read into a book when it just isn't getting it for you?  I am on page 106 and am not sure I like this book yet?  Do I give up on it?  Just throw it out?  (that seems a so hard for me to do!!)  Or do I keep reading and hope it gets better???

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Hello


Now just look at that picture.  I look awesome don't I?  Ok so my husband will tell yo that I look awesome now, but he is my husband and he loves me no matter what.  I, on the other hand, need to love myself again.  No I am not wanting to be the skinniest thing on earth.   But I do want to have the shape of something other than an apple again.  I am not sure an apple is the right description, an apple doesn't  have skinny arms and legs.... so what would that be? 
Tuesday is weigh in, and yes I am looking forward to it.  I want to know if what I have been doing is right or wrong.
This weekend has been good so far.  I did the "bucket drive" today.  Something really sad happended to me today when I was doing the bucket drive.....  when you are doing the bucket drive you learn to ask EVERYONE who walks by if they would like to make a donation to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  And I do that NO MATTER WHAT.   Today a lady was walking into the storee, she was dressed, very nicely,  skirt, nice shirt , heels.
I asked her if she would like to make a donation to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.  She stopped and looked at me.   I guess if you have never done a bucket drive you would not understand how odd that was.  Sometimes people stop and take out their wallets and donate, sometimes they say sorry  I can't right now and sometimes they just ignore you.  They don't ususally stop and just look at you.  But she did.  She said " I am very sorry, I have no cash on me, I forgot to go to the bank to get money for the minister."  I said "it's ok, have a nice day" .  She still stood there.  She looked right at me and said  " I am going to my son's funeral and I forgot to get money to pay the minister, so I have to stop at the ATM inside the store to get the money to pay him, I wish I had some cash to give you" . 
HELLO!  What do I say to that??   It was so obvious by this womans demeanor and her words and her dress and everything about her that she was not lying to me................................
I hugged her.  Maybe she could of hit me.  Who knows what I would of done if a complete stranger hadhugged me the day of my son's funeral.  She didn't, she hugged me back. 
All is right with my world right now.

Thursday, September 18, 2008


Isn't he just he cutest?? I just love this boy.  He loves to come to my house to go in the lake. I am not sure he remembers that it freezes.  Could be tramatizing this winter.
So my girlfriend and I joined a biggest loser culb on line. It is a free one.  I really like it.  I lost one pound this past week. She lost two. How come the other person always loses more?
So we texted back and forth all during the season preimere of The biggest loser (which I had never watched before but she has been a devoted fan forever) and of course I feel in love with the show and now I want to be "THE BIGGEST LOSER" but of course you must remember,  she lost more than me the first week!!  You all need to cheer me on here, she is not a part of jland so you won't be betraying anyone!!
I will keep you posted to let you know how I did next week.  The best part about this whole site is that it is FREE!!  Gotta love that.  Aiden needs to have the hottest gramma around right???

Monday, September 15, 2008

Good Morning!


Good Morning Everyone! 
It is very cloudy and dark out this morning.  While I was driving Kristen to school it looked as if it was going to rain some more.  It hasn't  yet but it sure looks like it is going to. 
I didn't get much cleaning done yesterday.  I didn't feel so well when I got home from the bucket drive yesterday so I laid down on the couch when we got it.  Well that laid down on the couch thing turned into a four hour nap.  I didn't feel any better when I woke up either.  I did manage to get the dishes into the dishwasher and running and a load of laundy into the washer but that was the extent of my cleaning.  I went to bed at 9 and slept the entire night.  Either I am trying to come down with something or I was very tired.  Feels more like trying to come down with something.
I have been looking at the recently updated journal entries lately, and the most commented ones.  I have found alot of journals that I am really likeing!  I love going though journals and finding new ones to read.  I just don't seem to have the time to do it often. 
I only have a few more weeks till my marathon.  I am so excited about this one.  My husband and my daugther and her best friend are going with me to San Francisco.  I booked our flights and our hotel and rental car last week.  The girls are so excited for this trip.  I am not sure when the last time they have been on a vacation.  We are staying there for an entire week.  It should be alot of fun.  My girlfriend, Brenda and her husband Rick are going also.  Brenda is running the marathon with me.  I have a partner this time.  That makes it so much nicer.  Not easier, just nicer!
I got an email this morning, telling me that i had made 206.00 for Saturday's bucket drive.  That is awesome!  Now I am waiting to hear how much I made for Sundays. Hopefully it will be around the same amount.  I could use it, I am very behind in my fundraising but that should help.  I also have another bucket drive that i am doing next weekend.  Every little bit helps that is for sure. 
Well I need to get my butt in gear.  I have to get to the gym today and I really need to do some cleaning around here. 
Have a great day.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Easy like Sunday morning......


I made it though the long day yesterday!  I may have been soaking wet by the end of it but I did make it. 
The bucket drive went well.  We made almost $700 yesterday and we had four people throughout the day so that will be a little over $100 dollars each for our fundraising.  It will be added to today also but I am not sure how many are working and if it is the same people as yesterday.  So it will end up being a bit more than that.  I have to get through my three hour shift today and then I will be free.  Free to clean house I guess!
After the bucket drive I went to Kristens game.  The football team won 32 to 0.  It has been raining and raining and raining some more here since Friday.  Yesteday it was raining when I started the bucket drive and it was raining four hours later when I was done.  The rain did not stop once in that entire time.  It slowed but it never stopped.  The football field was a mess, the boys were covered in mud.  I wasn't sure they were going to make the girls cheer but they did and they stood out there for the whole game and cheered.  I brought Kristen and her friend home for a shower right after.
Kristen was spending the night at her friends and I was going off to the party for Suzanne.  My drive there was horrible.  I am surprised that I drove the entire way (it is a 40 minute drive on a good day)  It was raining so hard at times that you couldn't see any farther than right in front of you.  The freeway was flooded in several spots.   It was very important to me to be at Suzannes 40th.  The rain was stopping by the time I got to the bar.  The bar we went to is called Boogie Fever.  I love Boogie Fever!   I danced ALOT last night.  I didn't drink last night (well I did drink water) it is just to long of a drive home and the weather was so bad.  The drive home was not anywhere near as bad as the one there.  It was still drizziling but not pouring.  I got home around 1am. 
Now I am just having some coffee, trying to wake myself up a bit and getting ready to head out to to the bucket drive.  Hope you all have a great day!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Busy day


Today is going to be busy for me.  I have to leave in a few minutes so work a "bucket drive" to raise money for the marathon for the leukemia society.  I will be there for four hours asking for donations.  I have done lots of bucket drives and they really are  not that bad, just alot of standing around.  Tomorrow I will be working it for three hours.  After the bucket drive I will have to run home and pick up Kristen and take her to her football game.  She is cheering today.  Looks like we are both going to be getting very wet since it has been raining for two days and it doesn't look as if it is going to stop any time soon.  Tonight after the game is my girlfriends 40th bday party.  It is going to be at a bar called "Boogie Fever"  I just love this bar.  They play 80's music, which is my favorite and they have a huge dance floor and I love to dance!  Any one want to come with me??
So from the minute I leave the door today I will be moving!  Tomorrow after the bucket drive (9am till noon) I will be done with all I have to do for the weekend.  I will be coming home from there and doing some cleaning.  I also have Monday's off since I work 10 hour shifts tuesday thru friday so Monday is going to be a relax day for me since I should have all the housework done by then!! 
I only have a few more weeks till we go to Talladega for the Nascar race and to see my bestest friend, Linda!  We have been planning for quite awhile, we go every year but we have to make it bigger and better each year.  So we are tossing around drink ideas right now.  Trying to find something good.  Any one got any ideas on good drinks?  Well I am off to do the bucket drive.  Have a great day.

Monday, September 8, 2008

I don't mean to be pushy


I don't mean to be pushy but I am begging!  I am so far behind in my fundraising, it's making me a little nervous.  So if you would like to check out my page to decide if you would like to help I would appreciate it so much!  If you would like to help me and pass this along or post it in your journal that would be great appreciated also.  Even a dollar will get me closer to my goal.  Thanks Linda
http://pages.teamintraining.org/mi/nikesf08/llawrenmqo



Wednesday, September 3, 2008

First college cross country meet


So after the funeral Kristen and I drove to Grand Valley so we could see Josh's first college cross country meet.  Josh is "red shirted" which means that he basically a fresman and his time and place is not used in the calculation of the race.  There are over 40 boys on the team and Josh came in 12th for his team, which is AWESOME!  He may get to wear one of those Grand Valley jerseys this year!  They are only allowed to compete for a certain number of years in college, and Josh is in a 6 year program so the longer he is "red shirted" the longer he will be able to be on the team.  Does that make sense to anyone but me?  I am not very good at explaining it although I understand it.  It was so good to see him looking so happy.  He really does like it there.

This is at the finish of his race and that is his high school coach who wanted to come see him run his first race.  I think that was awesome that he would be there for Josh.  The team had a cook out for all the parents and family and friends that showed up for the meet so we were able to eat with Josh also.  That was nice.  I hated to leave him again, but I think that is what life is going to be about now.
After Josh's race and the dinner, Kristen and I drove to Muskegon to see my girlfriend, Linda.  We didn't get there till late so we didn't do much but sit up and talk till late that night.  We went out to see Lake Michigan Friday morning.  Kristen had never seen it before and she just loved it!  We did a little bit of hiking though some dunes and walked in the water a bit.  It was COLD!  We had a great time but didn't get to stay long since Linda had to work and we had to get home.  We want to go back up there and camp next summer, they had an awesome camp ground that was in the state part, right on Lake Muskegon.  I can't wait for that trip!


Monday, September 1, 2008

where have I been??


Yep, its a residence hall.  I saw way to many of these in the past few weeks.  My life has been totally crazy for the past two weeks, I am amazed that I have survived it.  But I did and I am here to tell about it!
On the 17th I took Josh off to Grand Valley.  I thought I was going to not make it through it but I did.  I left knowing he had everything he needed and that he was happy where he was.  Cried like a baby all the way home but hey it was done.
On the 18th I took John off to Central.  Tough tough tough!  But he loved it there too.
I only needed to make it through work on the Friday and I would be on vacation for a week!  I thought it was going to be such a wonderful week. 
It all started on Sunday night.  I had enjoyed Friday night and Saturday and all day Sunday at the camper with our friends and family.  Sunday night my SIL had a bit to much to drink and fell going into her camper and messed up her nose, her lip and her chin.  It was a mess.  Long story behind all of that with the drinking.  I got up out of bed and went over there to help her.  Finally got her into bed and went back to my own camper.  My phone started ringing.  It was my cousin telling me that my Uncle had passed away.  So now I knew I would be traveling to a funeral for my vacation. 
My step daughter and I left on Wednesday.  There was viewing on Wednesday night and the funeral was on Thursday.  I took Kristen by the house that my grandma lived in and where I spent many of my weekends in the summer when she was alive.  It was very strange seeing the house again.  It looked so run down it made me a little sad. 
My aunt and uncle have owned cottages on the lake for ever since I can remember.  The cottages were made available for family to stay in so that we would be able to be close to the funeral home.  I have always loved their house and those cottages.  I spent alot of time there when I was growing up.  My aunt and uncle lived closed to my grandma but my mom and my other aunt had moved closer to Detroit, about 3 hours away from grandma.  I know the occasion was sad but I really loved seeing and staying it those cabins again.  My uncle had been in ICU for about six weeks before he passed and I think he was in pain, so his passing was almost a blessing.  He knew the Lord and he is in heaven now, so he has no pain anymore.

Cabins on the lake!

Lake during the day.

Lake in the early morning while I was sitting on the bench drinking coffee.

After the funeral they had a luncheon.  It was very nice.  My cousin, Mary, invited us over to her house after also.  I had been to Mary's house last year for my uncles 80th bday party.  ( I know there is an entry about that in here somewhere)  Her house then was amazing, but they had a new house built this past year.  It is in the same sub division as the other one but this new house took my breath away!  Kristen kept saying "this is my dream house!"  LOL!  Mary is the sweetest girl alive and I can't think of anyone who deserves such wonderful things more than her.  Even Kristen told me that she always thought rich people would be snotty but Mary and Tim were sooooooooo nice.  I couldn't agree more.  Here is a picture of the new house.



Well Kristen and I decided to make the most of a sad time and go on a little "mini-vacation" for a few days.  I will post more about that tomorrow!